lacking in love

So yesterday I shared the sermon notes that I took from the Mazak sermon. Well, today I will blog a little about my lack of love. I have been reflecting today about whether I get irritated easily by people and I have to admit that I definitely do. I don't always show it, but I don't always hide it either.

After listening to the message last night, I have been reminded about how wrong I have been in thinking the way that I do. What right do I have in being irritated by other people when the things I do and the way I react to so many things is probably a hundred more times irritating or upsetting to God? You know what they say as well, is that the things you get annoyed about the most are usually the things that you do yourself. It's the old mote and beam analogy all over again.

If I were to list things that annoy me, I could seriously do it all day because there are just so many things! Just today, I caught myself thinking a few times 'man, I can't stand it when....' or 'why do they have to...'. Yep, I'm definitely lacking in the love department.

There was a really good point at the end of the sermon that said that for those of us who have problems with loving others, we really need to meditate on God's forgiveness of our own sins. And I really think that is how I can start to develop the currently-undeveloped-Christlike-love that is in me. I am reminded of one of the lessons I learnt during the Regen Retreat - one of the messages was on God's Love and Jim Berg said something that struck me, something along the lines of 'God knew exactly how much of a sinner we were each going to be before he chose us and bought us with the blood of Christ'. That's pretty grounding isn't it? God knew ALL the things we would do against Him in the future, yet He still chose to send Jesus to earth to suffer and die for us! Wow. It floors me every time I think about that.

So the path to becoming more loving has only just begun. I guess now that I have recognised the problem in my life, I need to stop myself from thinking unloving thoughts and asking God for more love to cover the multitude of sins. It will be tough, but I believe it is something that I need to do.

Lord, help me to look at others with Your love. Help me to remember what You've done for me on the cross despite all that I have done against You. Help me to realise the sheer magnitude of Your grace, and allow this grace to flow through me to the people that rub me the wrong way. It is only through You that I can. Thankyou once again for Your conviction and for pointing out my transgressions. May You cleanse my heart. In Jesus name, Amen.